Attendants and Guests

How Do I Deal with Flower-Girl Pressure?

Help! My fiancé has two cousins and we've already asked the younger one (she's five) to be a flower girl. We are getting pressure from his family to ask the older cousin (she's 10) to be one, too. Any good suggestions?

His 10-year-old cousin is mature enough to graduate from a flower girl to a junior bridesmaid. However, unless her parents are willing to spring for the cost of the dress, this will be an added expense for you. If money matters or if you don't want to add to your bridesmaid roster, you can suggest that she wear a dress similar in color to your attendants' and make her a corsage-wearing cutie with special responsibilities.

To turn down the family heat, tell them that you want her to be your right-hand gal. She can huddle close while you and your maids are getting ready for the ceremony in case you need anything (like caffeine or munchies). Also, you can have her pass out programs and flower petals at the ceremony and menus at the reception. Gift coordinator is another important job. She could be in charge of directing guests to the gift table and keeping it tidy. Arm her with Scotch tape to secure loose cards on packages.