Attendants and Guests

I've Been Snubbed—What Do I Do?

My fiancé just got the invite to his brother’s wedding. Instead of putting my name on it, they wrote ”and guest.” I’ve been dating my fiancé for over four years, and we’ve been engaged for a few months, so they know who I am. Even worse, I wasn’t included on the rehearsal dinner invitation. Shouldn’t I have been invited too? Do we say something, or just leave things as they are?

Whenever someone on your guest list has a serious squeeze, the invitation should be addressed to both people by name, or they should each be sent a separate invitation. (If you’re planning to invite single guests with dates, show your hosting skills by calling the singletons and asking whom they’ll be bringing.)

But this isn’t a wedding felony that’s been committed, so cut them some slack. It may not even be your fiancé’s family’s fault, as the bride’s family usually does the wedding invites.

On the other hand, the rehearsal dinner guest list should definitely have included you. Since your main squeeze’s parents are likely hosting the party and, hence, controlling the guest list, your fiancé should talk to them (and to his brother). It may have been an oversight on their part that they would be happy to correct.