Attendants and Guests

Must My Sis Be My Honor Attendant?

My mother is insisting I ask my married sister to be my honor attendant, but I would prefer to ask my former college roommate. Should a relative or the bride's closest friend fill this top position?

There is no rule saying you must ask your sister to be your matron of honor. Rather, you should ask the person you feel most deserves the role. But it's not surprising your mother wants the spot to go to your sister—after all, you are both her daughters and no doubt she wants to imagine there is no one closer to you in the world.

Why not compromise? It is perfectly acceptable to have two honor attendants. Ask your sister to be the matron of honor and your friend to serve as maid of honor. They can split the typical duties of honor attendant; for example, your sister could host the shower and your friend could plan the bachelorette party. With two special attendants, you can rest assured that no task will be left undone on your big day.